Re the transfer time from Naples airport to the Calabria hotel: it's really not so bad and the 4 hours does include a comfort break.
Ultimately the journey is very scenic it doesn't feel so long; the tour itself is so lovely and the hotel a delight, that it's well worth it. If the journey is all that's putting you off, then don't think about it, you'll be missing a treat if don't visit...! 🙂